Scars of Love
by Nahina
Summary: "What is love?" he asked "I don't know, he never loved me back," she replied
1. Chapter 1

"Why?"

"Why Yashamaru?"

"She never loved you, I never loved you. You have never been loved." Yashamaru whispered

"She called you Gaara, that you love only yourself, care only for yourself, and no one else."

~.~.~.~.~.~

Gaara shook his head as he looked out into the village. The moon in all its full glory, and he couldn't help but wonder why, why that memory. He knew why, he knew that tomorrow his life would change, he was to marry the former heir of the Hyuuga clan. He knew that he would actually have to be married to someone and he couldn't help but let fear grip his heart. Would she love him? He knew it was foolish to wonder such things, he knew it was useless because even now, even after being Kazekage, he knew he couldn't be loved. He was no longer lonely, thanks to Naruto and his village but he was still feared. People praised him from afar, and only children ever came close to him because they weren't tainted yet.

"Gaara? You up here?" Temari questioned as she came out the window and saw him stare at the moon

"Will she love me?"

"What?"

"Will she be afraid of me?" he asked again

"You've changed Gaara, I doubt she'll fear you."

"Last time she saw me, she only knew me as the demon of the sand."

"But now, you're the Kazekage. From what I've heard about Hinata, and what I have seen, she won't fear you."

"But she can't love me, can she?"

"I can't say for sure, this is an arranged marriage after all. She probably had a lover back in Konoha."

Gaara said nothing as he listened to Temari. She was right, but he knew within himself that he didn't know how to love. He had never tried and had never been given the opportunity to do so. But he knew for sure, he protected what was precious to him. The Hyuuga may not have feeling for him, but as long as she abode in Suna, and if she did decide to go through with the marriage, he'd protect her with his life. For that, he thought as he looked as the moon, was his nindo, his ninja way. He would protect his precious people.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

"Hinata-sama, are you ready?"

"Hai, Neji-nii"

Hinata followed Neji through the village as they walked towards the gate. At the gate Hinata looked back as tears began to form underneath her eyes.

"It's not too late," Neji said, waking Hinata from her current reverie

"Wh-what?"

"We can go back, this doesn't have to happen, Hinata-sama. There are other females in the Hyuuga clan."

"Neji, it's fine." She said with a faint smile on her face as she started walking out of Konoha

"But,"

"It is my duty, as a Kunoichi of Konoha and member of the Hyuuga clan to do what is best for my village and my family. I know what I'm doing Neji, even if it means my unhappiness, as long as Hanabi isn't sealed, I'm content. She'd make a better heir anyway." Hinata said as she proceeded to walk

Neji nonchalantly looked at his cousin but yet with respect. He knew she did this for Hanabi, and as quiet and sweet as she was, nothing could stop her from protecting Hanabi. With that in mind, he followed after, hoping they could get to Suna in a day and a half a they traveled by night.

AN: This is rushed and there are many mistakes but I hope you enjoy, I had a block on brutal romantic and I just really liked the plot for this one in my head. We'll see how it goes


	2. Chapter 2

"State your name and purpose."

"Neji Hyuuga. The Kazekage is expecting us."

The gates slid opened before their eyes, and Hinata couldn't help but sigh at the monotonous look of the village. Neji kept walking though he sensed her agitation and sadness. There was nothing he could do now, they were already within the gates of Suna, and turning back now would be a cowardly move, though he was beginning to really consider it. He'd be a coward if it meant her safety and happiness. He'd do anything for her.

"Neji-nii…"

"Hinata-sama?"

"Thank you for coming a-along, I couldn't have done it w-without you."

He nodded, letting the faintest of smiles grace upon his features. As they entered the Kazekage tower, Hinata couldn't help but observe the look of surprise on the inhabitants of Suna as they looked at them. She wasn't surprised, the Hyuuga eyes were always an enigma to those outside Konoha, especially civilians.

"Hyuuga, Hinata."

"Temari-san, it's been a long while," Neji said as he looked her straight in the eye.

"Temari-chan, you look well," Hinata said as she smiled at the blonde beauty before her.

The last time they had met was during the spring in Konoha, and the allergies had gotten to her bad.

"What can I say? No pollen equals a well Temari. Anyways, we've been expecting you. Let me show you to Gaara's office."

As the trio walked into to the office Hinata couldn't help but contemplate on the fact that in a few days this would be home. Sand...brown...more brown...home? How?

~.~.~.~.~.~.~

"Get out,"

"But Gaara…"

"Get the hell out, Matsuri."

The intent to kill filled the room as Matsuri slowly pushed herself off the table. No matter how much she loved Gaara or tried to show her affection, he wouldn't permit it.

"You won't allow me to love you, but you're going to let in a complete stranger from Konoha?!" she yelled.

"That's enough!" he spoke sharply as he proceeded with his paperwork.

"You know I really love you Gaara…," she said looking dejected.

"And this here is Gaar-"

"In a very compromising position for someone willing to marry Hinata-sama." Neji said with anger.

At the sound of her name, Hinata looked up to see Gaara seated with a look of contempt as Matsuri's body was too close for comfort.

"Get off, Matsuri." he said calmly.

"No need, Matsuri-san. It would have be-been much app-preciated if you had made us aware of your affair Ka-Kazekage-sama. I don't want to t-take you from the one you l-love. We will be on our wa-ay," Hinata said silently before rushing out of the office, unaware of her whereabouts yet unbothered. She wanted nothing but to be as far away from here as possible.

 _ **[Flashback]**_

" _ **Where are you off to Hinata-sama?" Neji asked as he saw her walk out the gate with a bento box in hand.**_

" _ **Naruto asked me out for lunch today," Hinata blushed as she replied.**_

" _ **Ooh well, have fun," Neji said before walking out into the garden.**_

 _ **As she walked over to the park, she couldn't help but blush at how fortunate she was that Naruto has finally asked her out. Her face blushed as she remembered how he had kissed her - his lips connecting with hers... Though in an aggressive manner, she couldn't help but feel elation course through her bones just at the thought.**_

 _ **Walking peppily, she walked towards the park. As she turned, right before her eyes stood Naruto kissing Sakura. Her breath stopped; she didn't know how long, but it felt like eternity as tears welled up in her eyes, and she heard Naruto speak.**_

" _ **I love you Sakura,"**_

" _ **What about Hinata?"**_

" _ **No, it's always been you Sakura, I tried to love her back, but I couldn't. She's kinda weird anyways," he chuckled as they kissed.**_

 _ **Hinata's hands trembled, and she couldn't take anymore. She ran...never looking back.**_

 _ **[End of flashback]**_

"Nothing in there was realistic." Gaara said after finding the Hyuuga heir.

He couldn't help but wonder why she had left. The look on her face was almost one of embarrassment. But why was she embarrassed? He had been in the compromising situation.

"Ok," she whispered

"Welcome to Suna."

"We won't be staying Kazekage-sama," she said as she turned around to leave.

"Why not?"

"My heart has been played with enough for me to know when I'm not wanted."

"Not wanted? You?"

With a sigh, she looked at Gaara's piercing gaze and quickly diverting her glance.

"You don't know love too?"

"Huh?"

"Do you know what love is?" he asked nonchalantly

She looked at the ground as tears swelled up in her eyes.

"I wouldn't know," she said with a small smile as tears streamed down her face. "He never loved me back."


	3. Chapter 3

"Are you sure you'll be alright Hinata-sama?" Neji said as he looked at his not so little cousin

"Hai nii-san, I will be well taken care of here."

"Send me a message in case of any danger."

"You worry too much nii-San I will be fine."

"If you say so Hinata-sama but don't hesitate." Neji said reluctantly

"Hai,"she said, finally conceding

After hugging him and giving her final goodbyes Hinata couldn't help but feel her heart wrench in pain. Seeing Neji's form slowly fade into the horizon made her rethink. She should be going home. She should be with Naruto-kun, marrying him. She should be playing hide and seek with Hanabi. She should yet...here she was. Not home, no Naruto, no Hanabi. She was even missing the Hyuga compound albeit slightly.

"You don't have to stay you know,"

Shocked by the sudden presence beside her Hinata quickly dried away the tears that had subtly placed themselves on her cheek

"There's nothing to go home to." And it was true, her own family had cast her to Suna the moment they had the opportunity to do so. Naruto has left her for a walking, backstabbing bubble gum. And Hanabi would soon be too busy as the new heir. There really was nothing to go home to.

"If you say so, but you can leave anytime you feel you must. I won't marry someone whose heart is elsewhere."

With that Gaara walked away

Hinata couldn't help but cry, she couldn't even do dating right...yet again. For the love of all things, perhaps she really was meant to be a nun after all.

Suddenly she felt exhausted so she dragged her feet to the Kazekage tower hoping for some shield away from the roaring flames of the Suna sun. Life in the desert would take some getting used to. Physically, emotionally and mentally. If only her father could see her now, flushed, exhausted, fainting from heat and upsetting he only potential lover she had. Man would he be proud to call her his daughter.

 **ENJOY! Read and Review**


	4. Chapter 4

It has been a year since Neji left. Suna still doesn't feel like home but it was slowly getting there. Gaara has allowed me to do what I love. Teaching kids during the day and helping at the hospital at night.

The monster everyone had mouthed about, was not the man I had come to know. We still aren't close but at least we could consider ourselves friends. Every night after my night shift was over….I'd make my way to the tower where Gaara would be working. Every time I arrived he would stop to talk to me, ask about my day. It was nice.

He still didn't trust me, but I don't blame him. He's hurt. He's scarred.

"How do you think we can improve our services at Suna's academy?"

"The children need not be pushed so hard. Maybe give them an activity to look forward to during the week. Maybe ice cream Wednesday?"

Gaara's nonexistent eyebrows raised up quizzically.

"I don't get it."

"We are training them to be efficient ninjas. But not killing maniacs."

" I see."

That's when I realized I'd messed up.

"Sor-" he raised his hand to stop me

"So this ice cream Wednesday, what is ice cream?"

"WHAT? You've never had ice cream?"

Gaara peered at me closely. Then shook his head. I think my outburst may have scared him.

"Sorry," I said embarrassed.

"There's an ice cream store downtown Suna, I think they are opened till 5am. We could try it now."

Gaara looked at her. As though he was contemplating the chances of wanting to die.

"Ok"


	5. Chapter 5

Walking downtown was a funny experience. Hinata told him about her day. No one ever talked like she did. She trusted him far too much. But in a way, he was happy.

She didn't yell as Temari. She wasn't clingy as Matsuri. She was quiet, observant, and weirdly quirky. How she blushed at everything yet spoke with more strength than she had a year ago. She knew his people and they her. She took the time to talk to them, an act not familiar to the people of Suna, but they loved it.

He saw the way they looked at her. He wished they looked at him the same way. But they feared him. And it hurt a bit.

He heard Hinata gasp, drawing him from his thoughts. There was a little baby on the park bench. Crying.

Suna was hot, it's nights chilly though. Who would leave a child?

He saw her ran and pick up the child to warm it up. She loved his people, he could see it in her eyes. The worry for the abandoned child, the respect for her elders. The love for people she barely knew.

"Gaara."

"Hn"

"It's abandoned. There's a letter."

Dearest Aikari,

Know that I love you. But I can't take care of you. Whoever finds you will be lucky to have you. Whoever is reading this, please take care of Aikari for me. Though I must give myself to death today may my Aikari be lucky to have you.

Signed Lanaike

"The mother is dead…"

She started crying. She felt the pain of this child. She felt it's abandonment. She loved it. Could she also feel his pain? Could she love him too? For the child is him…

"Gaara," she sniffled

His heart smote against his chest. He knew he should say no. The elders wouldn't be happy. He couldn't be a guardian. He was barely stable as is. He knew to say no. He wanted to say no.

"Yes."

He couldn't. Not with the look in her eyes. He brought the light to her eyes. He wanted to do it again. She hugged him. He didn't know what to do so he did nothing. When she let go he knew he wanted her back.


	6. Chapter 6

"What the hell Gaara! This kid is a monster." Kankuro cried as a two year old Aikari hang from his neck.

"Ai!!"

" Auntie Emawi!" Aikari squealed, getting down to hug her favorite aunt

"Little b-"

"Kankuro." Gaara interjected menacingly

"How's my favorite princess?" Temari said as she twirled Aikari around. Loud squeals of joy erupted from Aikari causing Gaara to smirk ever so slightly.

Temari and Kankuro had been in support of him and Hinata's adoption of Aikari though the elders weren't. After many years of back and forth, they won. He had a child, even when he didn't have a wife. It was amusing how life set itself up.

"Where is Hinata?" Temari asked as she rocked Aikari on her knees

"Hospital emergency." Gaara replied without looking up from his paperwork. Both siblings nodded in understanding.

Temari loved Hinata as her own blood. She loved that she had forced Gaara to adopt Ai! And she knew that though Kankuro acted otherwise, he loved Ai. She and Hinata were the days of sunshine to brighten the Sabuko household in forever.

"Do you know how long she'll be away, I'm hungry." Kankuro whined

"I can make us something."

"On second thoughts, I'm not hungry. Death by food poisoning isn't how I aspire to die."

Temari couldn't help but hit him across the face. But she knew he was right. Hinata made the most delicious meals. Saving the entire family from Temaris burnt and tasteless meals.

"Report?"

"I came in contact with an Akatsuki member on my way back from the land of rain." Temari said, unable to help the slight disgust that rose within her

"Who?"

"Itachi Uchiha."

"Did he prove a threat to your mission?"

"No. I steered clear of him." Sorta…

"Good. Kankuro?"

"Konoha is fine. They will be sending Sakura their chief medic over soon to evaluate our hospitals and bring us to par."

"Good."


End file.
